{"id":131,"date":"2010-07-29T09:38:39","date_gmt":"2010-07-29T16:38:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theagingofaquarius.com\/dw_blog\/?p=131"},"modified":"2024-03-18T07:45:11","modified_gmt":"2024-03-18T12:45:11","slug":"the-lonely-road","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theagingofaquarius.com\/dw_blog\/the-lonely-road\/","title":{"rendered":"The lonely road"},"content":{"rendered":"

Many years ago my world ended at the age of 30. It happened the day I moved out of my house, away from my wife and four-year-old son, and into a drab apartment. Divorce happens and when one is young it truly seems to be the end of all that matters.<\/span><\/p>\n

Happily, we are profoundly ignorant in youth.<\/span><\/p>\n

These days, nearly 30 years later, I travel with my darling Carolann and our precious girls, <\/span>Cricket and Lady. Our motor home is perfect for us and so are we all. But I still hit the road alone frequently because I must. For that, I have a camper and a pickup. And when I go, I travel in my own good company because, after my first thirty years of living, I learned something rather delightful.<\/span><\/p>\n

I like me.<\/span><\/p>\n

“In solitude, where we are least alone.” — Lord Byron<\/span><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/a>Shortly after the separation, I was forced to go on vacation <\/span>alone. Still buffeted by the emotional storm I set out for a week by myself in a too-big rented house on the Northern California coast which, of course, was where my now ex-wife and I had spent many happy times together. Great choice, huh?
\n<\/span>
\nFor the first time in my life, I was truly alone. At the age of 30, I spent my first night ever in absolute and despairing isolation. I cried myself to sleep and the sound of it was disturbing.<\/span><\/p>\n

“With some people, solitariness is an escape not from others but from themselves.” — Eric Hoffer <\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I remember thinking it was odd to pass entire days without uttering a single word because there was nobody to hear it. So, I tried talking aloud to myself. It was a comically depressing exercise and I soon gave it up. But then a funny thing happened. I continued to hear my thoughts.<\/p>\n

This, too, was a first in my life and a stunning one.<\/p>\n

It was a distant voice, quiet and almost shy. It was I, trying to get my attention so I began to listen.<\/p>\n

I told myself to get out of my wallow and take a shower. Leave this place for a while, I said. And so, we did.<\/p>\n

“I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.” — Einstein<\/span><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/a>I put on nice clothes: slacks, a dress shirt, a tie and a jacket. I took myself to a nice restaurant and when I boldly asked for a table for one I added, “by the window, if possible.” I ordered wine, treated myself to an expensive meal, and had a nice, long, quiet internal conversation while watching the sun slide behind the Pacific.<\/p>\n

“People who aren’t alone are rather noisy, aren’t they?” I commented silently. “Yes, they certainly are!” I replied with a grin. Then I opened my notebook and began to write my impressions of the people around me. My inner self did the eavesdropping while I wrote descriptions. I gave them names. I invented their lives and I found I enjoyed them as well.<\/p>\n

“What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely alone can be.” — Ellen Burstyn<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

At the end of the evening, we went back to the rented house near the thunderous surf and squawking gulls. Amazingly, it was no longer empty.<\/p>\n

No place ever has been since.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Many years ago my world ended at the age of 30. It happened the day I moved out of my house, away from my wife and four-year-old son, and into a drab apartment. Divorce happens and when one is young it truly seems to be the end of all that matters. Happily, we are profoundly … Continue reading “The lonely road”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[156],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-131","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-solitude"],"yoast_head":"\nThe lonely road : The Aging of Aquarius<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/theagingofaquarius.com\/dw_blog\/the-lonely-road\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The lonely road : The Aging of Aquarius\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Many years ago my world ended at the age of 30. 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