Is it inevitable during this season of love that Valentine’s Day will end either in triumph or in tearful disappointment because of the gifts women do or don’t receive from a significant someone?\u00a0 Sad to say\u00a0– probably.\u00a0<\/p>\n
What do women want?\u00a0 Discussions persist among guy friends and girl friends.\u00a0 For all our insistence on clear communications in our relationships, both groups agree that we\u00a0send\u00a0mixed signals.\u00a0 If it’s any help at all, most of us are aware that we do.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Here’s what we think we want:\u00a0 A boyfriend to slow-dance with.\u00a0 Here’s what we really mean:\u00a0 We want to slow-dance until life turns serious, and then we want to wake up next to a grown-up who’ll go with us to visit a sick relative, and put on a suit when the occasion demands, and clean out the gutters before it rains, and pretend he doesn’t hate getting rid of whatever crawling thing scares us most.<\/p>\n
Here’s what we think we want:\u00a0 For our favorite gift-giver to read our minds.\u00a0 Our significant other should have been paying attention all this time and realize we look best in yellow gold.\u00a0 Here’s the reality:\u00a0 Men have been telling us for ages that they’re not in tune with subtlety.\u00a0 They say they don’t see or hear our hints.\u00a0 Not only would they prefer that we stop expecting mind-reading miracles from them, they’d like it if we’d hand them the newspaper ad and a map to the store.<\/p>\n
I’ve revised my definition of the perfect romantic gesture.\u00a0 This one doesn’t rely as strongly on Victoria’s Secret but more on the qualities of friendship.\u00a0 I learned this while eavesdropping in a cafe in Palm Springs.\u00a0 I could hear the nearby couple clearly.\u00a0They’d finished their breakfast and were going their separate ways for the day.<\/p>\n
He:\u00a0 “Let’s trade car keys.”<\/p>\n
She:\u00a0 “Why?”<\/p>\n
He:\u00a0 “I noticed your tank’s empty.\u00a0 Mine’s full.\u00a0 I’ll get your oil changed too.\u00a0 See you tonight.”<\/p>\n
I guarantee if every woman I know could hear something like that, every heart would flutter.\u00a0 I’ve thought about that conversation many times and it helps answer the question, what do women really want?<\/p>\n
Evidently we want it all.\u00a0 We want you to surprise us with a token that says you find us desirable.\u00a0 And then we also crave a practical demonstration of that, even if the distance you travel to show your devotion is only to the gas station on the corner.\u00a0 It’s the kind of thing Mr.\u00a0Darcy from Pride & Prejudice would have done if they’d had gas stations in his day.<\/p>\n